Free the Fairbanks One!

When BigShow first floated the idea that Alaska Senator Ted Stevens would walk [...] No related posts.]]> If you’re like us, you’re busy making final preparation for your big “VEEP Debate” watching party tonight. Make sure you keep plenty of whatever the heck to official food of Delaware and Alaska are handy. And some Rolaids.

Free the Fairbanks One!

When BigShow first floated the idea that Alaska Senator Ted Stevens would walk from his corruption trial, I thought he was nuts. After all, Steven’s had a new first floor on his house, and forgot to report it. This is not like forgetting to mention a porterhouse at the Capitol Grill. I was not counting on the categorical incompetence of the U.S. Attorney Prosecuting the case. Seems Brenda Morris forgot to mention potentially exculpatory evidence before yesterday. Evidence is required at Howard (Ms. Morris’ Alma mater), so I can only assume she slept through that semester. Mistrial proceedings are scheduled for later today. On a positive note, this makes me feel better about my job prospects.

Bingo!

Remember Arelia Margarita Taveras? She’s the former New Jersey attorney who brought suit against a series of casinos for contributing to her gambling addiction. Seems the Court didn’t buy it. In issuing the ruling, the comically named Judge Bumb – in an admirably succinct bit of dicta, noted – “[Ms. Taveras] spent money on the bona fide chance that she might win more money. In short, she gambled.” Ms. Taveras did not indicate if she was going to appeal the decision, but we can only assume that she’ll double down, and give it another at the jackpot.

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Anyone Surprised?

The Justice Department’s Inspector General released a report yesterday stating [...] No related posts.]]> Sometimes the news is just chock full of interesting legal stories that we just don’t know where to turn. the last two days have presented an embarrassment of riches, and so I’ve decided to throw them all together in our first installment of “Legal Briefs.”

Anyone Surprised?

The Justice Department’s Inspector General released a report yesterday stating that former employee Monica Goodling (go Regent!) and D. Kyle Sampson broke the law by asking politically based questions of potential Justice Department hires. According to may of those interviewed, Goodling’s interviews frequently in included perhaps my favorite phrase in the history of the Republic “What is it about George W. Bush that makes you want to serve him?” I’ll also note that Ms. Goodling’s attorney’s went to Emory and Michigan, so I guess that settles the ranking questions we’ve been kicking around.

That Was Fast.

Dick “Quick Draw” Heller was back in Court yesterday, filing a lawsuit against the District Government for a revised handgun regulatory scheme that in his opinion, contravenes the Supreme Court’s ruling. Heller has also announced that he will continue to file lawsuits until he is permitted to own a M1 Abrams Main Battle Tank.

I Wonder if His Nickname in the Joint Will be “Klondike?”

Senator Ted Stevens (R-Alaska) was indicted today on seven counts of making false  statements on his financial disclosure forms. Seems he neglected to mention $250,000 in gifts he received from an Alaskan oil company. Whoops! We at the Hypo wish the Senator all the best, and hope that this kind of corruption eventually makes its way over to the Judicial branch so we can get some of that cheddar.

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